How many times have we heard about overcoming fears and thought “well, easier said than done!”? Probably too many times. In this article, I will guide you through easy steps to help you conquer fears and actually use them as a tool for self-development.
- Understand the source of this fear
If we don’t get to the roots of our problems, they become more challenging to resolve. Always remember that we weren’t born with fears, we develop them as we grow and for different reasons. It is extremely important to think critically and realistically of the risks that our fears carry. For example, if you are afraid of airplanes because you think they might crash, make a little research about the likelihood of that happening and see if your fears still feel legitimate. The same applies to fears we face at the workplace, if we don’t rationalise them and think of where they emanate from, they will always be there. One could possibly develop fears because of a lack of self-confidence or other insecurities, once the source is identified, the process gets easier.
- Face it, and get it done as soon as you can
Rescheduling the event you are worried about or avoiding the meeting that might upset you is counter-productive. If you don’t do it fast, you’ll give yourself more time to be anxious. Just think about the number of hours and days you wasted on worrying about an exam instead of studying when you were a student, do you think that was a good use of your time? Absolutely not. The same applies to the worries you hold towards tasks at work and the time you spend overthinking them. Motivational speaker Mel Robbins actually teaches the five-second rule to different audience. No matter what you do, the rule is simple; you have five seconds before you blast off and do that task you are dreading. Once you do it, you will feel much better.
- Collect your successes and failures
We all have the tendency of getting over our successes much faster than failures. If you get a great job offer, you are happy for a week, if you fail an important exam, you’ll probably be sad for much longer. We need to constantly be aware of this and one of the ways of doing that is to write them down. This will allow you to regularly evaluate the progress you’ve made and to draw lessons learnt from your failures. It will also help you show more pride in your achievements.
- Think of the worst that could happen
What’s the worst that can happen? is indeed a great question. Think seriously of what’s at stake and what you might lose if you fail at a certain task. You’ll be amazed to see that what’s at risk is not as big as your worries!
- Make it a conscious process
In addition to dealing with fears because “you have to” or because your job depends on it, try to consciously identify fears to overcome because “you want to”. Should it be fear of cockroaches, rats or heights, it is never too late to overcome them. Think of why you are afraid, what is at stake, and how you have the power to face and conquer these fears that you could choose to live with. This will help you strengthen your self-confidence and will feed your sense of determination.
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